In this brief chapter, Perry tells a fascinating story about Laura and how a lack of nurture deeply impacted her health. From the onset, I was excited to learn about what Perry would discover in his work with her since many medical professionals were unaware of the underlying cause. I had never heard of a similar story so it was somewhat difficult for me to believe that this story was true.
Perry doesn't specify the exact year that this case occurred but I found it interesting that the possibility of infantile anorexia was even considered. Infantile anorexia feels unnatural and counterproductive to a human's survival instincts that I never considered that this could occur.
I greatly appreciated Perry's exploration of Larua's mom, Virginia. It can be too easy to blame or not empathize with parents when their children are experiencing health or psychological consequences but Perry shows readers that attachment and bonding can extend beyond a first glance. I was completely SHOCKED to learn of the different child welfare policies that were in place during Virginia's upbringing. For example, the fact that infants and toddlers were often moved to a new foster home every six months so that they wouldn't become "too" attached or that foster parents were not allowed to have any contact once the foster child became 18 years old. My goodness. What an awful set of policies that most likely affected too many children and their future children.
I have read before of how a baby's cuteness is an evolutionary adaptation but Perry's explanation served as a good reminder of the astounding ways that mankind has taken care of itself in hopes of prospering. I agree with Perry in that society tends to view mothers who do not "overwhelmingly tend to devote themselves to comforting, feeding and protecting their young" (pg. 84) as pathological. This widespread view is difficult to navigate, harmful, and obtuse since there are many reasons or contributing factors as to why this may be. Also, I found the comparison of a kitten's eye to be quite interesting. My initial assumption was that the unused functioning eye would have maintained its capabilities or would at least be able to regain its functioning with work and time. But in recognition of the "use it or lose it" philosophy and how development occurs, the opportunity being lost makes sense.
"Failure to thrive" is a new concept for me but the comparison of this theme with an animal "runt" of the family really helped me understand. The outcome of Virginia and Laura's story made me happy and it was encouraging to read of Mama P's fearlessness and relentless. Perry does a great job of pointing out the downfalls in the child welfare system but it was refreshing to read that the clinic/program had means to assist two mothers in such a hands-on way such as placing them in the same home. This chapter shows that there is hope and possibility even when early years are marked by trauma, distance, and a lack of caregivers.
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ReplyDeleteHi Kimberly,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your thoughts! I felt a similar curiosity when I first started reading about Laura’s case. While I also believe infantile anorexia seemed unlikely, I learned in my DSM class that there are multiple eating and feeding disorders that actually tend to impact younger children. Children do not always experience normal eating and feeding patterns. Some examples of disordered eating patterns include reluctance to eat foods based on taste/texture/sensory factors, or a loss of appetite and/or interest in food.
While Laura’s case was obviously different, it is interesting how many eating disorders start with a psychological or social stressor. Given this fact, I can understand why the possibility of infantile anorexia was considered. I’d be curious to explore more about the legitimacy of this diagnoses and if any known cases have ever been recorded. Before reading this chapter, I would have also had a hard time believing Laura’s physical problems were caused by a lack of love. The connection between the body and mind is truly amazing!
I also appreciated how Perry took the time to understand Virginia’s upbringing and how that influenced her mothering of Laura. Parents have SO much pressure put on them. I mean think about the prevalence of mom-shaming when a mother decides not to breast feed or can’t afford to buy her baby 100% organic food! My goal as a child therapist is to try to remain empathetic with parents because as we have talked about in our courses countless times, the therapeutic RELATIONSHIP is what drives change.
-E. Sterling
Kim,
ReplyDeleteI, too, echo your shock around the feasibility that Laura’s extreme inadequate weight gain was a result of the lack of personal attachment she had to her mother. I can imagine that her doctors and nurses also shared our suspicion that Laura’s weight gain and health improved due to her mother’s attention, love, and care. However, that is why I appreciate that much more this read because we are being exposed to much more than biological explanations of medical issues but rather bio-psycho-social-familial factors, or the eco-systems approach to health and wellbeing.
Many of the chapters we have read in this book have discussed early attachment being one of the most defining factors of a child’s outcome. I, too, think that parents are easily blamed for their children’s behaviors, however, when you have child welfare policies and practices that have prevented a mother from attaching to a caregiver herself, how can you rightfully blame her? Additionally, just because someone has a child, does that mean they know now how to raise them?. Many parents do not know about the “sensitive period” that explains that there is a window of time from 1-3 years old that is critical for kids to develop those safe attachment figures that teach them about safe love and affection (pg. 86). This begs the question that if we were a social worker with Virginia as our client and we didn’t know the full story, would we deem her attachment behavior as neglectful, just as the authors described (pg. 89)? This story also shows us how imperative parenting programs are for everyone especially when this development research is not widely known.